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How To Deal With Stress And Win

Do you really want to know how to deal with stress?

Here's my quick answer: Stop inviting stress into your life :)

I know, I know, that makes me sound like an ass. But most of us don't actually stop to think that we are responsible for allowing stress to overtake.

A lot of us go about life as if stress is happening to us, as if we have no say whatsoever. Plus we live in a world that rewards us when we stress ourselves the most.

Don't get me wrong - sometimes life comes at you so fast it's all you can do to just keep breathing. I've been there.

2009/2010 were two very rough years for me. I was still reeling from the effects of my recently ended marriage.

I had a child to take care of. And then I had a house bigger than I could afford to pay for.

My little girl was in private school I didn't want to disrupt that part of her life. After all, she'd already been through too much she didn't ask for, I reasoned.

The financial burden was proving too much for me to carry - I was under constant stress.

Stress and Long Distance Relationships

At the same time, I was in a long distance relationship - like really long, as in Iraq long- with an otherwise great guy, but our personalities clashed tremendously.

He thought I was too head strong and argumentative, I thought he was too judgmental and controlling. For 3 years I foughtfiercely to make the doomed relationship work.

However, that relationship came to a screeching halt around Christmas of 2009.

At the time I had also just taken a self important job as a financial advisor (oh the irony!) with one of those hoity-toity companies whose doors you walk into and immediately become self-conscious of your TJ Maxx clothes. But more on that later.

For the 6 months prior to the ending of that relationship I was under tremendous stress.

Looking back, it was all about "I didn't want to fail". I so desperately wanted to make that relationship work.

And I wanted to make my financial situation work. Can you see how I pressured myself into a stressful life?

Funny enough, when Tim and I called it quits, I wasn't devastated. Instead I was relieved. Spiritual guru Esther Hicks advises that a good way to gauge if you've done the right thing for yourself, is if it causes you to feel relief.

So how did I keep my head afloat during this time of immense stress?

Proceed to Part Two: Tips on How To Deal With Stress

› Ways To Deal With Stress

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